50 Random Things No-One Cares About
This is one of those “meme” things, I think. You know, someone comes up with a bunch of questions and then other people pick ‘em up and answer them, trying to be funny / entertaining / revealing / deeply personal / all or none of the above along the way. Anyway, never done one before, so I picked a big one and gave it a go.
1. Height
6 feet, 4 inches
2. Have you ever smoked heroin?
No. I’m a bit of a square here - all my drugs are legal.
3. Do you own a gun?
No. And that’s probably a good thing…
4. Who would you let eat crackers in your bed?
Right now? Pretty much any woman that wanted to. Ideally? Gillian Anderson.
5. Do you ever get nervous before doctor appointments?
Nope. Don’t go to the doctor’s, that’s why.
6. What do you think of hot dogs?
They wouldn’t be hot if they hadn’t been shut up in a car all day; leave a window open, damn you!
7. What’s your favourite Christmas song?
The really filthy version of “The 12 Days”. Altogether now; “Five motherf…”
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Another beer. But as most days are work days, coffee.
9. Is your bathroom clean?
Why are you singling out my bathroom? All of my rooms are just as dirty as each other.
10. Can you do push-ups?
Not a hope in hell.
11. What’s your favourite piece of jewellery?
The only piece I wear everyday - my St. Christopher medallion. Patron saint of travellers keeps me safe on my bike.
12. Do you like painkillers?
Only when I’m in pain.
13. What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
Broken.
14. Do you have ADD?
Sorry, what did you say? I was just looking at that other thing, over there.
15. What’s your name?
Wolfie
16. Middle name?
Begins with R.
17. Name three thoughts at this exact moment.
I’m a man; I can’t think of three things at one time.
18. Name the last three things you bought.
Pizza, petrol, fruit.
19. Who is your favourite visual artist?
Hopper.
20. You’re stuck on a deserted island with two other people; who would you want to be stranded with?
Either: two guys that knew how to build a boat to get us off the island. Or: Gillian Anderson and Rowan Pelling.
21. You’ve won a major award and have thanked your family. Who else would you thank?
What makes you so sure I’d thank my family? I’d thank everyone else for being gracious enough to let me win!
22. Current worry?
Waistline. Money. Usual sort of things.
23. Current hate?
Oh, so many. Which to choose? (This is why it’s good I don’t own a gun).
24. Favourite place to be?
Somewhere else.
25. How did you ring in the New Year?
Quietly at home.
26. Where would you like to go?
Heaven. Failing that, Cornwall.
27. Do you own slippers?
I don’t even rent them.
28. What shirt are you wearing?
A white one. I have several white ones. I like white ones.
29. Do you burn or tan?
Burn, then tan. Eventually.
30. Favourite colours?
Red and blue. Basic, that’s me.
31. Would you be a pirate?
Only if I could be a Jack Sparrow type of pirate.
32. Are you gay?
Well, I’m quite happy.
33. What songs do you sing in the shower?
Out of tune ones.
34. What did you fear was going to get you at night when you were a child?
The creature under the bed. But I always kept my arms and legs under the covers, so I was OK. And that strange yowling creature outside (which later turned out to be a cat - never have liked cats).
35. What’s in your pockets right now?
Nothing. Not even fluff.
36. Where are you?
Not where I want to be.
37. Best bed sheets as a child?
Weird question. I never had any cartoon ones or anything like that; the ones I remember are the candy-stripe ones.
38. Worst injury you’ve ever had?
Kept me in intensive care for nine weeks when I was a baby. Still bear the (considerable) scars today. I figure I’m going to live forever now, ‘cos if I was going to die, it would have been then. Since I can remember? Broke my left little finger; not really in the same league.
39. You’re on a trip around the world and have to select five landmarks to visit; what would you pick?
Mont Blanc tunnel. That really big, new bridge in France. Ayers Rock. The statue of Jesus outside Rio. Empire State Building.
40. How many TVs do you have in your home?
None, I made them all leave. They kept arguing over mascara.
41. Who is your loudest friend?
He’s not really loud, but he makes his presence known. He knows who he is.
42. Who is your quietest friend?
That would be the guy I’ve known the longest. Although, he can be quite loud sometimes.
43. Does someone have a crush on you?
If they have, I don’t know about it. But that’s the way of crushes, isn’t it? It would be nice if someone did, but it’s unlikely.
44. Do you wish on shooting stars?
I wish I’d seen one to wish on.
45. What is your favourite book?
Tough one this, I read so many. My favourite opening to a book is in The Crow Road by Iain Banks. Other than that, I can’t really pick a favourite.
46. What is your favourite candy?
Milk chocolate. And lots of it.
47. What song do / did you want played at your wedding?
Never been in that position. Never likely to be. But something upbeat is definitely called for.
48. What song do you want played at your funeral?
I used to have a long list of the songs I wanted played, but forget now what most of them were. I know I wanted Brothers in Arms by Dire Straits, and maybe Goodbye by Peter Cook and Dudley Moore.
49. What were you doing at 12am this morning?
Sleeping. Finally.
50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?
That I hadn’t had enough sleep, so I’m having another half an hour.
Nit picking time
Could I just take this opportunity to point out to the blogosphere - mainly our American cousins, I fear - this little correction in grammar:
Your : belonging to you
You’re : shortened version of “you are”
Example: “Whilst you think your still playing your “A” game”.
The first your should be you’re, because “you are still playing”; the second your is correct, because the “A” game belongs to you.
Simple, isn’t it?
Go Lewis!
Formula 1 has this year welcomed a young British driver to the grid, Lewis Hamilton. Driving for McLaren, who have been nurturing his talent for the last ten years or so, Hamilton has made the best start to the season of any rookie ever; one third place and four seconds in the first five races of the season. [edit: make that one 3rd, four 2nd and two wins in his first seven races, to be 10 points clear at the top of the championship, ahead of reigning champion Alonso]
A stand-out aspect of this young star’s driving is his ability to gain places at the start of the race, one of the most important over-taking opportunities in what is, largely, a very processional motorsport with only limited over-taking opportunities.
He also has the ability to drive very maturely under pressure - whether that pressure is coming from his team-mate (current world champion Fernando Alonso) or his Ferrari rivals Kimi Raikkonen and Felipe Massa. All-in-all he exhibits driving ability of someone with much greater top-flight experience, as well as being the current top British driver, ahead of veterans like David Coulthard and Jenson Button.
Which makes Jacques Villeneuve’s comments in Autosport magazine all the more difficult to understand. Villeneuve, lest we forget, is a former world champion who is not currently racing in Formula 1 since he became too expensive for the poor results that he was getting.
An more unkind observer than I might think that Villeneuve is jealous because he was only champion in the year when he happened to be driving the best car, or that by the standards of Formula 1 he is only an average driver, or that he only got where he did by trading on the name of his more flamboyant, exciting father.
What I would take issue with is when Villeneuve says that Lewis make “aggressive defensive moves away from the grid”. Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do? It’s a race, for goodness sake, not a politeness competition: “Oh please, after you..”
He also criticises “chopping moves” that Lewis has made; from what I’ve seen, Lewis makes determined and definite advances. He has not caused any accidents, he has not caused any damage to an other drivers car; he just goes past them. Again, isn’t that what he’s supposed to do?
Finally, in another criticism, Villeneuve says that Lewis has “started to look the way Michael Schumacher used to”. That’s Michael Schumacher, seven times world champion, the most successful Formula 1 driver ever. That Michael Schumacher. I think that if I was in my first season in my sport and someone compared me to the greatest exponent of that sport that ever lived, I’d take that as a compliment not a criticism. I certainly wouldn’t want to be compared to a nearly-man like Villeneuve!
It seems to me that there’s a certain amount of sour grapes attached to Villeneuve’s comments and I’d say to Lewis Hamilton: keep it up son, you’re doing great, don’t change it.
Wesley Crusher drops the ball on viral marketing.
Anyone who’s read The Wolf’s Howl more than once (thanks, by the way) will know from this post that it’s Wesley Crusher - Wil Wheaton in the real world - who got me into blogging. His was the first blog that I read with any great regularity and I still do; I think he’s great at making his everyday life (touched as it may be with a bit of Hollywood glamour) real for his readers. I recommend you read him.
Constant Readers will also know that a little while ago I responded to some posts by Jason Calacanis about PayPerPost. I couldn’t get past the idea that here was a man criticising bloggers for using their blogs to earn money, while at the same time using his blog to earn money. It didn’t seem quite right, but the main thing that I objected to was that he called PayPerPost evil. As I said at the time:
“Evil is Hitler. Evil is people dying of starvation in the Third World while the West gets morbidly obese. Taking money for talking about products is journalism.”
Now I’m afraid that poor Wil has joined that clan. In this post (a sequel to this one where he was trying to drum up votes for himself on Bloggers Choice Awards ), he says that PayPerPost is “at best deeply unethical, and at worst damn close to evil”. You see, there’s that e word again.
I’m sorry, but I can’t equate a bunch of bloggers taking payment to write about a product or service as evil. Let’s have a little perspective here, people, shall we.
I don’t get behind this idea that blogs are somehow sacrosanct and free of outside influence, that they are somehow pure. Let’s take Wil, for instance, he’s been using advertising on his site for a while. This post details his reasons for taking it down, but the upshot is that he is not averse to earning money from his blog. Calacanis has all sorts of links around his blog that earn him revenue, as does Mike Arrington (TechCrunch) - who just recently at MESH called PayPerPost CEO Ted Murphy “the most evil man in the room” - that e word yet again.
In the print media, advertising space is quite often sold off the back of editorial; this editorial is not always identified as being paid for. Likewise, I’m sure there’s many a product manager who’s been told “Well, we’ll run the piece if you pay us £XXX to cover colour separation charges”. It’s been going on since Man invented the printing press, so why should the Internet and blogs be any different?
“Disclosure”, I can hear you shouting from all sides. “What about disclosure?” Well, now this is a thorny issue as I have read comments by some (not necessarily PayPerPost Posties) who say that they would not disclose when - or if - their blog has sponsored content. However, in a section called Requirements of Note, PayPerPost say on their site - before you even sign up to be a Postie - that:
“You must be prepared to disclose your relationship with PayPerPost advertisers and advise your readers of any sponsored content via a disclosure policy or on a per post basis.”
They also say:
“It’s up to you to pick the Opportunities that best suit you and your blog. If it doesn’t feel right, if you don’t own the product, or if you can’t be honest we ask you to pass on the Opportunity. Dishonest or completely off-topic posts can ultimately hurt your blog’s credibility. We strongly encourage you to only take opportunities that relate to you.”
There will always be some bloggers who do not disclose all of their sponsored content, - or who will alter their opinion just to get paid - but they are by no means all part of the Postie clan and by no means all individuals without vested business interests.
I think a little perspective needs to be taken. If you’re reading about a product or service on someone’s blog there’s always the possibility that their opinion is coloured by some outside influence; they may be getting paid for the blog, sure, but there may be all sorts of other reasons why they have the opinion they do. If you’re going to base your buying decision on what you read on the Internet, then you need to make sure that you’ve read lots of opinions, including the magazines and periodicals that deal with that market sector.
Every development in technology eventually leads to a widespread business application; now it’s the turn of blogging.
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I suppose, for the sake of clarity, that I should disclose at this point that I am not a PayPerPost Postie. I do not work for PayPerPost. I know one of the guys that works there, but that’s it. This blog is not sponsored, this post is not sponsored. Any links I provide are there because I think you might find them interesting. I do have a link to the company that I work for, but I do not earn commission from anyone clicking that link. Thank you.
A little Hawaiian lesson (are you listening Jason?)
In Hawaiian thinking, words have spiritual or divine power, and aloha and mahalo are among the most sacred and powerful.
Say them often as they can be life-transforming and -enhancing. Be careful to use them ONLY if you truly feel mahalo or aloha within. Do not exploit these words for personal gain, and neither cheapen, nor trivialize their use by verbalizing them carelessly or without sincerity.
Aloha and mahalo are ineffable, indescribable, and undefinable with words alone; to be understood, they must be experienced.
On a spiritual level, aloha is an invocation of the Divine and mahalo is a Divine blessing. Both are acknowledgments of the Divinity that dwells within and without.
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So, not really appropriate for a glorified search engine, then.
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