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Serious Stuff
By Wolfie | March 16, 2008
A couple of days ago, I wrote Suicide is Painless?, when I was particularly down in the dumps. It was one of those posts that I was in two minds about posting, but clicked the “Publish” button before I could think about it too much. I’m glad I did, because it seems to have struck a chord with some people and I’m grateful that I’ve made that level of connection.
But at the same time, it’s a little disturbing. This is serious stuff; attempted suicide is very prevalent amongst young people, and for that reason, I wanted to do a follow-up post to respond to a couple of comments that I’ve had and to perhaps give a better view of my perspective on the subject.
First, my perspective. I’ve never seriously considered ending my life, although I’ve known people that have tried and one person that succeeded. Every now and then my mind will toy with various ways that it might be done, but I’ve never actually set out to do it. I’ve never seen it as a sin, as those religious types do; to me, it’s a statement. What that statement might be, though, very much depends on the person involved. For some it might be a statement of resignation: “That’s it, I quit”. For others, it might be a message aimed at one particular person: “Look what you made me do”. For still others, it might be something as simple as “OK. Bored now. What’s next?”.
We can argue back and forwards for ever as to whether suicide is the coward’s way out or a very brave thing to do and either view could be correct. I think it takes a lot of bravery to actually go through with it, but what brings a person to that point may be their wish to run away from what the world is throwing at them.
In the comments to Suicide is Painless?, Anonymous said:
I’m only 17 and I feel pretty much exactly like you do in every way… I’ve come inches and seconds away from committing suicide 3 times now. And I was going to do it again tonight, believe it or not. It’s just good to know that others feel exactly the way you do
which I found quite disturbing. Here’s a person who - at only 17 - has already tried to kill themselves three times. 17 is no age at all; at 17 you should be full of the joys of life, eager to get out there and sock it to the world. It should be a time of discovery, learning and happiness. It shouldn’t be a time when you’re looking around for a high building to throw yourself off.
You can always find bad in the world - you don’t even need to look too hard these days - and you can always feel like things are never going to get better, if you let yourself. But you can also always find good in the world - although you might have to look a bit harder - and the troubles of the world are not yours to worry about (unless you are George W. Bush, in which case yes, it is all your fault). No matter how down you might feel, no matter how desperate your situation is, you can find something to be thankful for. Hold onto it and keep the thought of it with you at all times, and remind yourself of it when times get bad. Ignore the troubles of the wider world and concentrate on making your own world better.
If you don’t feel you can do it by yourself, ask for help. And keep asking until you get it. The first person you ask may not want to know, or may not be able to help. Move on to the next. And so on. If you can’ find someone in the real world, well one of the great advantages of the Net is that it puts you in instant contact with millions of people.
This hasn’t, perhaps, been the most cheerful series of posts and not necessarily what The New Wolfs Howl would normally provide. My apologies for that, but I think (hope) that it has been worthwhile for at least some of you. I don’t think that I have still really got a handle on my thoughts about it but I feel that I’ve at least started to show you where I’m coming from.
Categories: Life |
Tags: Depression, Suicide
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:: Serious Stuff | The New Wolfs Howl had this to say:
[...] Serious Stuff | The New Wolfs Howl: [...]
4:00 pm :: March 16th, 2008:: brightfeather had this to say:
Thanks for posting again Wolf. I’ve been really worried about you. Please accept this [GREAT BIG HUG].
9:25 pm :: March 16th, 2008:: Wolfie had this to say:
@brightfeather:
9:29 pm :: March 16th, 2008[GREAT BIG HUG] gratefully accepted.
:: this time ~ this space » Grief: Learning from a major loss in your life had this to say:
[...] Did You Know? • You can postpone grief but you can’t avoid it, • unresolved grief can evolve into physical ailments, pain, and stress, • unresolved grief will re-emerge the next time someone you love dies, • natural disasters that involve death can bring up feelings of grief, • tapping into your creativity can help in your grief process, • your conscious intentional approach to grief work will teach others to do the same, • most grievers need help and support, • grieving the loss of a loved one sometimes evokes concerns about our own deaths. [...]
4:57 am :: March 25th, 2008:: this time ~ this space » Straight Talk: An Open Letter to Wolf had this to say:
[...] was encouraged when I read your next post on this because it sounded like you heard the wake up call so I sent you a [GREAT BIG HUG] that you [...]
9:32 pm :: March 28th, 2008